So it's been a few plus days since I have written on my blog. Guess you could say I've had a few things on my mind. Sorry to neglect any readers, but it's all been for the future plans that I may I have mentioned a few times here in some of my posts. It's been a long time coming, lots of keeping things to myself as recommended by some advisers, because people like to snag really good ideas and capitalize on them for themselves. So I was scared into silence, even though I had to talk about it to someone. Where to find that someone...
A few years ago I read a book that lead me to create an E-commerce website. Honestly, had I really known what I was getting into, I may not have done it, that being water under the bridge at this point, I am here. I have a website that has been up for more than a year with lots of great triathlon products. The site is going to go under major new construction with an upgrade to a new platform, more 'tricked' out look with more bells and whistles to help all you tri-geeks out there navigate with ease and find what you need quickly. Should be fun! I'm trying to psyche myself up here, you see.
It's been a bit of a labor of love for the first year, as I think anything you do on your own has to be, otherwise you're just a bit nuts. I have gone through a few learning curves and navigating through them has been made easier, more recently, with the help of one great friend! But I have had some serious moments of terror, as I call them, when everything you seem to be doing feels like your doing it on really thin ice and you are not sure if walking further out on the lake is such a smart or safe thing to do. I wrestle with the idea of 'certainty' every day it seems. Is this what I should be doing, is it going to work? Then I start to think of the alternative, going back to my original career, where they are only hiring designers and architects with 5 years experience max. A futile endeavor that actually feels worse to even think of pursuing, than walking out on the thin ice.
It all makes me a bit anxious, to put it mildly. I think I should have had a few nervous break downs by now, but I have this crazy ability to let it out, in the quiet of my little apt, when no one can see me or hear me. I find a way to release the doubtful demon crouching inside me and eventually, I stop shaking, wipe away the tears and somehow get back up off the shower floor and either go to bed, because it's 3 AM and I need to sleep, even if my mind wont let me, or pray...again. For grace, strength, faith, certainty to shine on me just enough for me to take some action the following day. Move me forward one more step in the right direction. This is my daily wish, to the angels of the day that I say a portion of my prayers to. They are probably sick of hearing me ask for the same damn thing! Like 'get a new wish already' lady! I picture that they are saying this to each other. I also picture them, like Nicolas Cage in 'City of Angels' sitting on my floor, watching me, inches from my face, but of course, I can't see him. So crazy!
So now after this new year is moving quickly forward, lots has changed. My one design client, that was my 'bread and butter' for this entire year, decided to bail, just like that, after months of work, putting me on hold, then back to work, just like that, we don't want to build a house anymore. Ah, what??? I wanted to go through a window I was so mad. I couldn't work out, I couldn't think, I definitely couldn't talk without saying some ****ing words I shouldn't repeat here. Stay calm I tried to tell myself. After a few days of cooling off, and some glimmers of light shining through on my 'other' project, I realized, again, what keeps happening over and over. It's as if this big angel wing just keeps knocking over every option I am trying to pursue in design, which inevitably means to me that I shouldn't be pursuing that avenue anymore. It would be so much easier if they just smacked me upside the head and said, Hellooooo, don't go that way, go over There!
But we have 'free will' to do the stupid thing that we shouldn't do. Right. Hone the skill of listening to your intuition. My new years resolution this year, and it is working. You have to listen hard though, because it's never a scream or that smack upside the head, it's a whisper, that subtle voice inside your head that you can barely decipher. I need to go get 'ear candleing' to make it better, ha.
Anyway, after I realized that walking the path of thin ice (i.e. design work), wasn't the way to go anymore, I realized the little glimmers of light that had been flickering in the corners of my eye, were what was leading me towards triathlon. Not just the website, but a bigger endeavor I have been thinking of for about a year now. The idea I was told to keep under raps until I had more information about how I was going to do it. People on LinkedIn reached out to me, shared their interest in 'connecting' to make something happen, I met a women in the parking lot of the grocery store. If I had not stopped to do what I was doing, and just walked in the store like I always do, I would have missed her completely, never met her or made that connection. She 'just happened' to be a triathlon coach and a newly certified race director. I said, 'we should talk'. Like I said, everything in design, falls flat on its face, but the triathlon stuff, slowly, like the Capricorn goat that I am, keeps me moving forward, up the mountain. Every now and then, I am thrown a little nugget that I now really see, is helping me get to my goal, and she was a 'nugget'. Thank God I have patience is all I can say!
So now, finding that 'someone' whom I can tell all my ideas to and not feel threatened that they are going to disappear and show up a year later in another state. A Friend...it's a word that I think gets thrown around like 'Love' on the Bachelor or Bachelorette. In my entire dating life, I have told one guy, just one, that I loved him. You may think that's lame, but it's not something I take lightly or fall into in a month. People today say it after dating for 20 minutes. That will never be me and I am completely OK with it. Unfortunately, 'friends' I think has or is at least for some people I know, been following suit in some ways. I think some, if not most, are really, acquaintances, not friends. I have never been one of those people who have a ton of girl friends. I probably had more guy friends in high school and definitely in college. I went to RIT, at the time I was there, it was a 14-1 guy to girl ratio. I really didn't have much choice. Back then, they were friends, they had my back and I knew it. Now, when the shit hits the fan and no one is left to help you clean it up, you realize very quickly where the people fall in line. But then something amazing happens, and luckily for me, it has happened a few times in my life. I honestly think, a guardian angel invades their bodies and they do amazing things that make you believe in humanity again. And that is what happened to one friend of mine a few months ago.
I hadn't talked to her in awhile actually. But when I was having these dillusional thoughts about opening a triathlon store and creating a race series, I thought, who do I know that knows retail like nobodies business. I actually never told her, (so she told me later), about the race series. She found out about that when I sent her my business plan to review, and that was the kicker for her. But initially, I knew I needed someone who was amazing at getting a store up and running. My friend is in a different state, time zone and a new mom with a business of her own, so I knew I couldn't steal too much of her time, but she was so excited about my ideas, it was like getting a shot of adrenaline every time I spoke to her. Like I said, she became inhabited by an angel.
We've been talking since the beginning of the year. She had gone through this proposal I received from a few business men that I had met who were interested in my business. They gave me this 'deal' and she advised me, along with a few other good, smart friends I have, that I should RUN. Just say NO.
One of my prayers reminds me to 'be careful what you wish for, you might just get it'. Well this was one of those things. I needed help with SEO (search engine optimazation) on my website, I needed capital for my store and I found someone who saw the potential, but they also saw my 'green' glowing body. Needless to say, I didn't take the deal, my idea is still safe with me and growing now, two months later, without their capital. Slowly moving up the mountain and the angels are still with me, thankfully. I'm also not so green anymore either. Good thing too, it's not really my color.
So after a few conversations with a few plus people, the idea for the retail store, switched places with the idea to create a triathlon race series. Yes, you can call me crazy, now that you know. It's a big bite to take out of a small niche market, even though I have been involved with it, in some way for almost 20 years. But what the heck do I know about starting a race series, or even putting on one race? Well, thankfully, I never thought about it that way. I just saw a need in the market, tons of athletes signing up for races that sell out like rock concerts, in minutes, literally, and if they don't get a spot, they are SOL (shit outa luck). So I'm going to change that! Yes, little ole' me has this big idea and I have one friend, who's become inhabited by an angel, who believes in me. I am slowly realizing that my miracle is happening, ever so slowly. So now, it's going to go, website then race.
I adjusted the business plan, again. Sent it off to my friend, who gave it to someone close to her, without giving them too much info. They both had the little 'light bulb' go off. My friend contacted me and was all over me about, 'you didn't tell me about the race'! That's huge, she said. I just said, 'really, I didn't mention that?' Duh!!! Anyway, since then, we have talked alot. Hours and hours and hours. Brainstorming, me making sure I tell her everything in my head. Although the other day, I hit her again, with something I thought she knew and of course, it just so happened I hadn't told her about this one other thing. She turned the 'issue' that seemed like it may be a problem on it's head and made it a huge positive that pretty much had me dancing around my apartment. So again, inhabited by an angel, a really smart angel too!
It's been fun, challenging, terrifying, lonely, cold, hot, cold again, enlightening, a huge learning experience about business, people, life, mistakes, paths less traveled, serendipitous meetings, light, tears, sleepless nights that never seem to end until one day you start to see that you are not a hopeless case and believing in your miracle happening is exactly what you should do every moment of every day until the path less traveled isn't quite as bumpy. Or maybe you just get used to the bumps and they don't rattle your cage quite so much anymore. It's amazing when you put your mind to something you really believe in, you really can do it. Amazing things can happen, even late in the game.
So...what is next? Well, we are going to have a race! It's the first one, and it is going to Rock, literally. Not only because the race is going to be great, but I am going to have a rock concert the night of the race! And you are going to want to come and race with me, late summer 2014, in Colorado and then you're going to want to come back and race the next year and follow me to the next races I do. It's where the light is leading me, it's where my inhabited angel friend is determined to help lead me and walk by my side the entire way with me. It's where the terror ends and lots of laughter and smiles and dancing and music are going to overwhelm a community of athletes and families and where I plan on going from here on out. There is no stopping me, it's happening! This week lots of good things happened, lots of players came to the game and more are being scouted to join me. I have no doubts about the fact that I'm going to still be on a bumpy road, because this is new, and there is a learning curve, but my angel friend is bringing me more angels, I can feel it. So stay close to my website, it's going to look different in the next few weeks, new things coming. Just wait! And stay tuned to see the new pages for the Race. It's gonna be great and you're gonna want to be there!
Here is a hint ~
ASATSY (as soon as they say Yes!)
Be unpredictable...Do Something Crazy...Embrace Your Wild Side...
'All you need is 20 seconds of insane courage, and I promise you, something great will come of it!!'
from the movie...'We Bought A Zoo'
Caroline / Triathleta xo
A few years ago I read a book that lead me to create an E-commerce website. Honestly, had I really known what I was getting into, I may not have done it, that being water under the bridge at this point, I am here. I have a website that has been up for more than a year with lots of great triathlon products. The site is going to go under major new construction with an upgrade to a new platform, more 'tricked' out look with more bells and whistles to help all you tri-geeks out there navigate with ease and find what you need quickly. Should be fun! I'm trying to psyche myself up here, you see. It's been a bit of a labor of love for the first year, as I think anything you do on your own has to be, otherwise you're just a bit nuts. I have gone through a few learning curves and navigating through them has been made easier, more recently, with the help of one great friend! But I have had some serious moments of terror, as I call them, when everything you seem to be doing feels like your doing it on really thin ice and you are not sure if walking further out on the lake is such a smart or safe thing to do. I wrestle with the idea of 'certainty' every day it seems. Is this what I should be doing, is it going to work? Then I start to think of the alternative, going back to my original career, where they are only hiring designers and architects with 5 years experience max. A futile endeavor that actually feels worse to even think of pursuing, than walking out on the thin ice.
So now after this new year is moving quickly forward, lots has changed. My one design client, that was my 'bread and butter' for this entire year, decided to bail, just like that, after months of work, putting me on hold, then back to work, just like that, we don't want to build a house anymore. Ah, what??? I wanted to go through a window I was so mad. I couldn't work out, I couldn't think, I definitely couldn't talk without saying some ****ing words I shouldn't repeat here. Stay calm I tried to tell myself. After a few days of cooling off, and some glimmers of light shining through on my 'other' project, I realized, again, what keeps happening over and over. It's as if this big angel wing just keeps knocking over every option I am trying to pursue in design, which inevitably means to me that I shouldn't be pursuing that avenue anymore. It would be so much easier if they just smacked me upside the head and said, Hellooooo, don't go that way, go over There!But we have 'free will' to do the stupid thing that we shouldn't do. Right. Hone the skill of listening to your intuition. My new years resolution this year, and it is working. You have to listen hard though, because it's never a scream or that smack upside the head, it's a whisper, that subtle voice inside your head that you can barely decipher. I need to go get 'ear candleing' to make it better, ha.
Anyway, after I realized that walking the path of thin ice (i.e. design work), wasn't the way to go anymore, I realized the little glimmers of light that had been flickering in the corners of my eye, were what was leading me towards triathlon. Not just the website, but a bigger endeavor I have been thinking of for about a year now. The idea I was told to keep under raps until I had more information about how I was going to do it. People on LinkedIn reached out to me, shared their interest in 'connecting' to make something happen, I met a women in the parking lot of the grocery store. If I had not stopped to do what I was doing, and just walked in the store like I always do, I would have missed her completely, never met her or made that connection. She 'just happened' to be a triathlon coach and a newly certified race director. I said, 'we should talk'. Like I said, everything in design, falls flat on its face, but the triathlon stuff, slowly, like the Capricorn goat that I am, keeps me moving forward, up the mountain. Every now and then, I am thrown a little nugget that I now really see, is helping me get to my goal, and she was a 'nugget'. Thank God I have patience is all I can say!
So now, finding that 'someone' whom I can tell all my ideas to and not feel threatened that they are going to disappear and show up a year later in another state. A Friend...it's a word that I think gets thrown around like 'Love' on the Bachelor or Bachelorette. In my entire dating life, I have told one guy, just one, that I loved him. You may think that's lame, but it's not something I take lightly or fall into in a month. People today say it after dating for 20 minutes. That will never be me and I am completely OK with it. Unfortunately, 'friends' I think has or is at least for some people I know, been following suit in some ways. I think some, if not most, are really, acquaintances, not friends. I have never been one of those people who have a ton of girl friends. I probably had more guy friends in high school and definitely in college. I went to RIT, at the time I was there, it was a 14-1 guy to girl ratio. I really didn't have much choice. Back then, they were friends, they had my back and I knew it. Now, when the shit hits the fan and no one is left to help you clean it up, you realize very quickly where the people fall in line. But then something amazing happens, and luckily for me, it has happened a few times in my life. I honestly think, a guardian angel invades their bodies and they do amazing things that make you believe in humanity again. And that is what happened to one friend of mine a few months ago.I hadn't talked to her in awhile actually. But when I was having these dillusional thoughts about opening a triathlon store and creating a race series, I thought, who do I know that knows retail like nobodies business. I actually never told her, (so she told me later), about the race series. She found out about that when I sent her my business plan to review, and that was the kicker for her. But initially, I knew I needed someone who was amazing at getting a store up and running. My friend is in a different state, time zone and a new mom with a business of her own, so I knew I couldn't steal too much of her time, but she was so excited about my ideas, it was like getting a shot of adrenaline every time I spoke to her. Like I said, she became inhabited by an angel.
We've been talking since the beginning of the year. She had gone through this proposal I received from a few business men that I had met who were interested in my business. They gave me this 'deal' and she advised me, along with a few other good, smart friends I have, that I should RUN. Just say NO.
So after a few conversations with a few plus people, the idea for the retail store, switched places with the idea to create a triathlon race series. Yes, you can call me crazy, now that you know. It's a big bite to take out of a small niche market, even though I have been involved with it, in some way for almost 20 years. But what the heck do I know about starting a race series, or even putting on one race? Well, thankfully, I never thought about it that way. I just saw a need in the market, tons of athletes signing up for races that sell out like rock concerts, in minutes, literally, and if they don't get a spot, they are SOL (shit outa luck). So I'm going to change that! Yes, little ole' me has this big idea and I have one friend, who's become inhabited by an angel, who believes in me. I am slowly realizing that my miracle is happening, ever so slowly. So now, it's going to go, website then race.
I adjusted the business plan, again. Sent it off to my friend, who gave it to someone close to her, without giving them too much info. They both had the little 'light bulb' go off. My friend contacted me and was all over me about, 'you didn't tell me about the race'! That's huge, she said. I just said, 'really, I didn't mention that?' Duh!!! Anyway, since then, we have talked alot. Hours and hours and hours. Brainstorming, me making sure I tell her everything in my head. Although the other day, I hit her again, with something I thought she knew and of course, it just so happened I hadn't told her about this one other thing. She turned the 'issue' that seemed like it may be a problem on it's head and made it a huge positive that pretty much had me dancing around my apartment. So again, inhabited by an angel, a really smart angel too!
It's been fun, challenging, terrifying, lonely, cold, hot, cold again, enlightening, a huge learning experience about business, people, life, mistakes, paths less traveled, serendipitous meetings, light, tears, sleepless nights that never seem to end until one day you start to see that you are not a hopeless case and believing in your miracle happening is exactly what you should do every moment of every day until the path less traveled isn't quite as bumpy. Or maybe you just get used to the bumps and they don't rattle your cage quite so much anymore. It's amazing when you put your mind to something you really believe in, you really can do it. Amazing things can happen, even late in the game.So...what is next? Well, we are going to have a race! It's the first one, and it is going to Rock, literally. Not only because the race is going to be great, but I am going to have a rock concert the night of the race! And you are going to want to come and race with me, late summer 2014, in Colorado and then you're going to want to come back and race the next year and follow me to the next races I do. It's where the light is leading me, it's where my inhabited angel friend is determined to help lead me and walk by my side the entire way with me. It's where the terror ends and lots of laughter and smiles and dancing and music are going to overwhelm a community of athletes and families and where I plan on going from here on out. There is no stopping me, it's happening! This week lots of good things happened, lots of players came to the game and more are being scouted to join me. I have no doubts about the fact that I'm going to still be on a bumpy road, because this is new, and there is a learning curve, but my angel friend is bringing me more angels, I can feel it. So stay close to my website, it's going to look different in the next few weeks, new things coming. Just wait! And stay tuned to see the new pages for the Race. It's gonna be great and you're gonna want to be there!
ASATSY (as soon as they say Yes!)
Be unpredictable...Do Something Crazy...Embrace Your Wild Side...
'All you need is 20 seconds of insane courage, and I promise you, something great will come of it!!'
from the movie...'We Bought A Zoo'
Caroline / Triathleta xo
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What is your Greatest Inspiration? What keeps you moving forward? To Pay it Forward? To stay healthy? Share your Passion? Make your mark on the Sport of Triathlon?